HeikeBKK Blog

Right now nothing exciting, nothing sensational is happening in my life. So I thought it might be a rather good idea to set a goal. I want to go back to Thailand! I am thinking Summer 2011, maybe 6-8 weeks, something like that. This would give me the chance to see lots of people again, to re-visit The Regent's and all the remaining staff and so on. I am getting all excited about that.
This plan, however, is not the solution to the problem that many of my "Thailand friends" are not in Thailand anymore, but in the US, in Australia, in the UK etc. How do I manage to meet all of them again one day in my life? I don't know. But still, one cannot have everything in their lives. x

Today I decided that being a better me actually suits me. I did watch Twilight which I actually promised myself not to do a while ago. But I did it because Ulli asked me to and I figured that it wouldn't be too bad if I did her that favour. And the surprising bit? And enjoyed myself watching that movie!
Also have I started doing my ANA homework today already (although I won't need it before Friday) so I can help two friends of mine who usually are stuck with their homework and need it on Mondays already. Aditionally I am petsitting two hamsters for three days and doing all that I feel like a good person. I like the feeling.
I feel better starting this week than I felt before the last one. It makes me smile.

Getting up at 6am I didn't yet know what a crappy morning that would turn out to be. I sat in that waiting room at my doctor's surgery and thought - why the heck do all the other people around here look exactly the same? Same face, same voice, same sleepy eyes, same sloppy walk, same everything. I felt so much not a member of that patient party that it actually started hurting. Am I just imagining that or is the whole world really that homogenic that I cannot manage to fit myself in it properly?

I feel stuck. Stuck in those daily rhythms that I funnily have chosen myself. Stuck in physical pain. Stuck in work. Stuck. Not able to move -- sometimes it seems so unbearable. It's the same feeling like when you lie in bed and the silence around you seems to mash you - or like in a full bus it feels like a heavy elephant was sitting on your chest, making you unable to breath.

But then again everything is going according to plan. I got that practical at my favoured school, I work very hard to be able to save enough money to one day fly to Thailand to visit my friends. Though this doesn't seem to be enough to satisfy me.

Dieser Slogan passt doch gut - Neueröffnung. Ich reihe mich ein in die Gruppe der Blogger, denn man weiß erst, wie etwas ist, wenn man es selbst versucht hat. Auf geht's!